Heaven, REPENT, Testimony

MY TRIP TO HEAVEN, A TESTIMONY – Handmaid of the Most High

Photos courtesy Depositphotos


Febuary 24, 2024 9:19 PM
Handmaid of the Most High

February 17, 2024

2 Corinthians 1:3-5 AMP
Blessed [gratefully praised and adored] be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort, [4] who comforts and encourages us in every trouble so that we will be able to comfort and encourage those who are in any kind of trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. [5] For just as Christ’s sufferings are ours in abundance [as they overflow to His followers], so also our comfort [our reassurance, our encouragement, our consolation] is abundant through Christ [it is truly more than enough to endure what we must].

For the past couple weeks, the Holy Spirit has been urging me to share my experience of going to heaven. I have been reluctant because I have read a number of accounts that had more extensive experiences than I, and so, I felt it would be perceived a bit dull. The Holy Spirit continued to urge me saying that it would comfort some readers, who have been anxious about the next step of life and/or had a recent loss of a loved one.

Remember Jesus said, “The thief comes to kill and destroy. I came to that they may have life and have it abundantly!” John 10:10

In the spring of 1995, I went to a surgery center for a repair to my right knee. I was placed under anesthesia.

During the procedure, my spirit left my body and the next moment I was outside the entrance of heaven. as I sat on the right edge of a park bench which was facing a massively high gold wall. Immediately, I looked to my left and Jesus was sitting on the bench as well!. As soon as I saw Him, He spoke to me (spirit to spirit, there were no audible words), “Now is not your time, you still have work to do”. I began to argue (I wanted to stay) and had the audacity to wave my right index finger in His face as I stood up before Him. Before I even spoke, that I didn’t want to leave my spirit was back in my body.

The next thing I remember I was calling for the woman, who had brought me to the facility (she was a deaconess at the church I was attending). Repeatedly I asked her as I would struggle to come awake but each time I was told she wasn’t there. Later, I heard the machine to the left of my bed, sound an alarm. I heard a nurse say “Code blue, code blue, Oh my God, Oh my God, we’re loosing her again! If we loose her, there will be all hell to pay!” as she approached me. It was about 10 hours before I was awake and able to open my eyes (prior to admittance, I was told me that the entire procedure and recovery process would be between 3-4 hours).

At discharge, the staff said they were concerned about me bleeding because I had been doing so for hours, which was not normal, and it should have stopped after I was stitched up. As a result, I required close observation. They only agreed to release me if the deaconess promised to watch me throughout the night, checking me hourly. Once in the car, I asked her why she wasn’t at the facility when I called for her (3 times that I can remember). She said that wasn’t true, she had never left the facility. The Holy Spirit later told me that the staff didn’t want her to witness my unconscious state in case I died and someone sued them.

Two weeks later, I saw the surgeon for follow-up, he told me that a screw had not stayed in its place and he needed to open me back up to secure it. I said, “Are you kidding me? I’m not going under again, I know that I died.” His body went rigid, his back was to me and he did not turn around. A few seconds passed, then he left without saying a word. I waited for him to return, to give me my prescription for physical therapy (PT) but after more than an hour passed, I crutched to the check-out desk. I asked for the PT orders and the clerk said she thought I had already checked out. After asking several people, she told me that the doctor hadn’t written any orders nor did he record a follow-up date.

Two days later, I received a certified letter stating I was terminated from the surgeon’s care. A few days after that, my primary care doctor, who had referred me to the surgeon also terminated my care.

I tried to get information regarding the situation, specifically what was used in the anesthesia cocktail to sedate me, so it could be avoided for use in a future surgery, but no one would acknowledge my contact.

The Holy Spirit said that no one responded because they were afraid to do so, that somehow that information would be used in a lawsuit against them, thus their reactions to my experience was fear based.

Folks, I want you to know, I had no fear at finding myself outside of heaven. Though I could not see inside, I had perfect peace while outside and I knew it was a place of joy and peace. Truly glorious.

People ask me what color Jesus was. He appeared to me as a brilliant golden yellow. Which is consistent to the scripture stating He is the light of the world (John 9:5 NKJV). To those who want Him to be their color, I believe He would manifest that shade to bring peace to that person. (Isaiah 9:6)

After this experience, I was very depressed for several years. I had really wanted to stay in heaven. I knew that it was better to be there than on earth. Eventually, I went for spiritual counseling because I was angry at God for sending me back. I became rebellious and even attempted suicide several times.

The last attempt, it was a sunny afternoon as I lay on my bed and waited to fall asleep forever and being with my loved ones once again. I had taken a large number of sedatives and vodka. Suddenly, I was fully awake and quite sober, running to the bathroom to vomit the concoction and in the process, I ended up covering all surfaces in the bathroom! Then, I heard the Holy Spirit speak “Do you think I brought you this far to allow you to die?” I said “No Lord“. And I promised Him that I would never attempt suicide again.

There is no sorrow in heaven. No pain. No fear. No negative experiences. I believe if I had been inside the walls, I would not have been able to heal from my depression – at the time, this was going on, I had only been out of the Illuminati a couple years, however, they managed to continue physically abusing me and sabotaging me in many aspects of life. I also was experiencing horrible flashbacks of extreme abuse throughout my childhood as well as some of the many murders I had witnessed that included my own babies and my very best friend.

There were many times I couldn’t even get out of bed and I stopped eating! I ended up in the hospital for eating disorders but the doctor decided it was connected to my CPTSD. During this time, there were many nights I would awaken myself because I had been screaming loudly in my sleep or because I was sobbing in my sleep as my subconscious mind was releasing the memories of what I had witnessed and experienced and had blocked from my conscious mind because they was so atrocious at the time it actually happened.

Through all this, I experienced many miracles of healing and I began to trust the Holy Spirit to help me become free. The Holy Spirit has been so comforting as I have been shown the most horrific things! There have been times, when the Lord has appeared before me in human form (in the spirit) and spoke comforting words. He often reminds me that He has never left my side. Deuteronomy 31:8, Deuteronomy 4:31

The Holy Spirit has taken away the tremendous pain I have experienced at the hands of others. My emotions at times were so overwhelming that I was unable to speak what I was remembering. The Lord has removed so much of my grief, I can’t articulate the depth and power by which I’ve been delivered. Additionally, He has delivered me of many demons that entered during the rape episodes, the incredible abuse I was subjected to often being knocked unconscious even as early as 18 months. Or being treated like a dog at age 8, being chained to the cement floor at the color around my neck. For several weeks, I was naked in a hot warehouse in the summer and being required to bark like a dog before I was fed dog food and water. I had to stick my face in the bowls and lap up the water and the food like a canine.

There were many episodes of programming that included such severe electric shock, that my body would freeze and I thought my heart would explode, this began at age 3 and continued into adulthood.

I have been healed of my desire for retribution. I’ve been told by doctors that they can’t believe I am sane. I tell them I have been comforted by the Holy Spirit and I can tell they do not understand…Friends, I share this to allow you to grasp the POWER OF THE LIVING GOD!

Call on Him and He will answer! Jeremiah 33:3.

Many of the things you see in horror movies (which I DO NOT recommend viewing) are depictions of things that have happened and will continue to happen. I was used in snuff films as well as child pornography. The pornography filming started when I was a toddler. My first snuff film occurred when I was four years old. Many of these films I was in were made by very well-known Hollywood directors and a few Internationally known European directors. Understand that seeing these events makes you a spectator/participant of evil and allows access to demonic spirits in your life. Please repent to the Holy Spirit regarding this involvement.

As a satanic ritual abuse survivor, I was subjected to Monarch Mind Control which includes Wizard of Oz, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Alice in Wonderland and other very specialized government secret mind control programs – by breaking my silence, those involved in the operation of these programs, will result in even greater dedication in murdering me (there has (been a contract on me since 1991 and the financial reward is greater than $275K (according to the Holy Spirit) to see that I am permanently silenced. I know that they will not be successful, I have had a gun above my right ear, that when shot, the gun suddenly locked-up. Other times the bullet went somewhere else though the gun was at my head, according to science says it is impossible.

As long as I have breathe in my body and hands that are able to type messages, I will remain a servant to my Lord. Please pray against the various ways I am sabotaged. Presently, I have 3 infections as well as the other physical issues I face. I know without question that these prayers make a huge difference! God Bless You, I pray you have been encouraged by this message.

~Handmaid of the Most High~ Acts 2:17-18

Photos courtesy Depositphotos



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