A TASTE of MY HEART
August 15, 2020
Handmaid of the Most High
For the last four plus years, I have had occasions where emotion will just fall upon me and it is often intense and typically very sad. Sometimes I weep, while other times a few tears slide down my cheeks as I cry out to the Father. The last three nights, I have had these episodes and tonight it was especially powerful. I’ve been crying. I have been told it is a taste of the Father’s heart for the lost children. Soon, it will be to late. The dance will be over and the partner you chose is the one you spend with in eternity. Did you pick wisely?
He told me tonight,
I am so broken-hearted over my lost children, no parent could even understand this. While parents spend nearly all their hours watching over infants and toddlers, soon that cherished one has experiences outside the parent’s knowledge. They grow and have friends and comrades, that they share adventures with and meet adults that influence them in many ways, that they don’t even see or realize.
But I do. I have walked with them every waking moment and through every dream at night. I see them consider their actions and behaviors and what is important. I see those who raised in religions that often enslave them into a moral code that may restrict or free them. They in turn will choose to embrace it or reject it. They will start doing things in secret that no one will ever know.
But I will. I will see their every breath, thought and action. Good or bad. The consequences that will influence the trajectory of their life. Whether these choices lead to kindness or evil. Life or death. Happiness or grief. Positive or negative not only upon themselves but upon their families, their neighbors, their teachers and their friends (and their enemies too). These choices will lead them to wealth or poverty. Strength or weakness. Action or inaction (for even not acting is acting). It will all become a bigger picture. But ultimately, it will lead to heaven or hell. Their choices will lead to life or death, not only for them but for others.
Meanwhile, I wait and watch. I yearn to reach out and touch. I yearn for them to reach out and touch. I yearn for their tender words of love and life. I yearn to hear them pray and ask for assistance. I yearn to hear them asking my son to cleanse them of all their trials and sins, yes, even those secrets that they believe no one knows. I yearn for them to share. To trust. To lean. To cry out. I yearn to heal their broken hearts and their broken dreams. I yearn to wipe away all their tears and to remind them that this to will pass. I want to show them new things, new experiences and new joys. I want to liberate and free. I want to honor them with blessings unspeakable. Joy that overflows. Love that endures. I want to caress them when they are weary and speak encouragement to their very soul and spirit. I want them to know the depth of my love.
But, they reject me. They wander from me. Their ears are deaf and their eyes are blind. They have hardened their hearts to the suffering of others, including their own. They look to the flesh that is corruption and seek to make it better, happy, pampered but it does not benefit but for the briefest moments, it leaves them hungering for more more more. It makes them wonder what is the point? Why do they feel so empty? But no one tells them. No one shares my love. No one says, surely you must be born again. They are surrounded by the silent. Those who are as empty as they or those who know enough to get by. Those that know they said a prayer but have no growth, no seeking heart nor even desire to fan the flames that once burned. There is but a tiny ember in them, which is nearly extinguished.
But, though I send my messengers, my prophets, my word, though I show it in signs all around, they prefer to believe in “experts” that are as empty as they are. They prefer a lie instead of the truth.
But, they had a chance, they had the time to seek me and did not. Soon, they will be no longer. They will die in their empty state.
But they will have no excuse. They never asked me for guidance, for love, nor sought me while they could. I have stretched out my arm to them for many seasons. I have shouted to them through the events of the world. I have crossed their paths with believers.
But they went to hell.
The Lord has spoken.
~ Handmaid of the Most High ~ Acts 2:18, Psalm 37:30
Luke 16:20-31 King James Version (KJV)
20 And there was a certain beggar named Lazarus, which was laid at his gate, full of sores,
21 And desiring to be fed with the crumbs which fell from the rich man’s table: moreover the dogs came and licked his sores.
22 And it came to pass, that the beggar died, and was carried by the angels into Abraham’s bosom: the rich man also died, and was buried;
23 And in hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments, and seeth Abraham afar off, and Lazarus in his bosom.
24 And he cried and said, Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus, that he may dip the tip of his finger in water, and cool my tongue; for I am tormented in this flame.
25 But Abraham said, Son, remember that thou in thy lifetime receivedst thy good things, and likewise Lazarus evil things: but now he is comforted, and thou art tormented.
26 And beside all this, between us and you there is a great gulf fixed: so that they which would pass from hence to you cannot; neither can they pass to us, that would come from thence.
27 Then he said, I pray thee therefore, father, that thou wouldest send him to my father’s house:
28 For I have five brethren; that he may testify unto them, lest they also come into this place of torment.
29 Abraham saith unto him, They have Moses and the prophets; let them hear them.
30 And he said, Nay, father Abraham: but if one went unto them from the dead, they will repent.
31 And he said unto him, If they hear not Moses and the prophets, neither will they be persuaded, though one rose from the dead.
Luke 7:36-50 King James Version (KJV)
36 And one of the Pharisees desired him that he would eat with him. And he went into the Pharisee’s house, and sat down to meat.
37 And, behold, a woman in the city, which was a sinner, when she knew that Jesus sat at meat in the Pharisee’s house, brought an alabaster box of ointment,
38 And stood at his feet behind him weeping, and began to wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet, and anointed them with the ointment.
39 Now when the Pharisee which had bidden him saw it, he spake within himself, saying, This man, if he were a prophet, would have known who and what manner of woman this is that toucheth him: for she is a sinner.
40 And Jesus answering said unto him, Simon, I have somewhat to say unto thee. And he saith, Master, say on.
41 There was a certain creditor which had two debtors: the one owed five hundred pence, and the other fifty.
42 And when they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both. Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most?
43 Simon answered and said, I suppose that he, to whom he forgave most. And he said unto him, Thou hast rightly judged.
44 And he turned to the woman, and said unto Simon, Seest thou this woman? I entered into thine house, thou gavest me no water for my feet: but she hath washed my feet with tears, and wiped them with the hairs of her head.
45 Thou gavest me no kiss: but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet.
46 My head with oil thou didst not anoint: but this woman hath anointed my feet with ointment.
47 Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little.
48 And he said unto her, Thy sins are forgiven.
49 And they that sat at meat with him began to say within themselves, Who is this that forgiveth sins also?
50 And he said to the woman, Thy faith hath saved thee; go in peace.
Psalm 56:8-9 King James Version (KJV)
8 Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not in thy book?
9 When I cry unto thee, then shall mine enemies turn back: this I know; for God is for me.
Romans 6:23 King James Version (KJV)
23 For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Matthew 6:24 King James Version (KJV)
24 No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.
Psalm 6:1-6 King James Version (KJV)
6 O Lord, rebuke me not in thine anger, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure.
2 Have mercy upon me, O Lord; for I am weak: O Lord, heal me; for my bones are vexed.
3 My soul is also sore vexed: but thou, O Lord, how long?
4 Return, O Lord, deliver my soul: oh save me for thy mercies’ sake.
5 For in death there is no remembrance of thee: in the grave who shall give thee thanks?
6 I am weary with my groaning; all the night make I my bed to swim; I water my couch with my tears.
Matthew 21:33-42 King James Version (KJV)
33 Hear another parable: There was a certain householder, which planted a vineyard, and hedged it round about, and digged a winepress in it, and built a tower, and let it out to husbandmen, and went into a far country:
34 And when the time of the fruit drew near, he sent his servants to the husbandmen, that they might receive the fruits of it.
35 And the husbandmen took his servants, and beat one, and killed another, and stoned another.
36 Again, he sent other servants more than the first: and they did unto them likewise.
37 But last of all he sent unto them his son, saying, They will reverence my son.
38 But when the husbandmen saw the son, they said among themselves, This is the heir; come, let us kill him, and let us seize on his inheritance.
39 And they caught him, and cast him out of the vineyard, and slew him.
40 When the lord therefore of the vineyard cometh, what will he do unto those husbandmen?
41 They say unto him, He will miserably destroy those wicked men, and will let out his vineyard unto other husbandmen, which shall render him the fruits in their seasons.
42 Jesus saith unto them, Did ye never read in the scriptures, The stone which the builders rejected, the same is become the head of the corner: this is the Lord’s doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes?
Matthew 23:37 King James Version (KJV)
37 O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, thou that killest the prophets, and stonest them which are sent unto thee, how often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not!